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Sharon
Ontario,
Canada
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I was the stay at home Mom of a toddler and I was anorexic when the local health clinic granted an abortion based on low income and failed contraception. Our second daughter lost her life in a huge, suburban hospital. I have almost no memory of the procedure. Everything was spotlessly sterile and unfeeling. I was put under heavy anaesthetic, then, afterwards, sent home to continue on as usual. Eventually, I deserted the marriage.
When I later became pregnant out of wedlock, I still had not come to terms with the abortion and I had a Band-Aid fix on my self-hatred. A single mother with a five year-old, in sheer terror, I scheduled a second abortion. The father of my unborn child refused to ever see me again if I ended our child's life. Only for this reason did I decide just one hour before the abortion that I would not go through with it.
When I failed to show up at the hospital, the secretary telephoned and told me to come in for referral to an obstetrician. When I did, the hospital's abortionist attempted to shame and ridicule me into rescheduling, but he failed and my daughter Julie was born seven months later.
Self-loathing and selfishness led to my abortion. Afterwards, my spiralling, out-out-control destructive behaviour almost resulted in a second abortion.
I am blessed today to have six grown children. However, my abortion caused two premature deliveries by caesarean section and endangered the lives of my other children, something that no medical staff had ever warned me may well occur if I had an abortion. My first son was born two and one half months premature, was very ill, and had to fight for his life.
After a second premature delivery, medication was administered throughout my other pregnancies. My body's natural ability to judge just how long a pregnancy should last had been destroyed by my abortion.
I discovered too that the contraceptive devices I'd been using don't prevent a baby from being conceived. That's what we're told. The truth is that contraceptive devices and pills only prevent a newly conceived baby from surviving in the mother's womb. Once conceived, the child will die of starvation.
I have begged for and received forgiveness from God for taking an innocent human life, the life of my own child. Silent No More Awareness helped me to stop pretending and hiding and to discover the deep worth of every human being, born and unborn. Since my Rachel's Vineyard Retreat two years ago, I've even begun to recover from my losses.
Increasingly I'm aware that life will win because life comes from God, Who is the Author and Finisher. I willingly embrace every opportunity to be silent no more.
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Silent No More Awareness Campaign: Reach Out - Educate - Share
www.silentnomoreawareness.org |
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