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The Silence Was Deafening!

Joanne McDuffee, Regional Coordinator
Massachusetts, United States

At 17 years old I became pregnant, very afraid and confused I went to my parents. 32 years later I can still see the look of disappointment on their faces. I was so ashamed . Within 24 hours of telling them I was pregnant, I was sitting in the waiting room of the abortion clinic.

No one spoke to me, no one counseled me, no one told me the truth of what was about to happen. And because of my shame ..... I didn't ask.

The silence was deafening!

The next morning I was back to school, and although the world looked strangely normal, cars and people moving towards their day, the trees and flowers just as they were the day before.

I was not the same. The person who walked into the clinic the day before, didn't exist anymore.

I began to feel angry towards everyone. Angry that the world and everyone in it seemed to be moving forward in their lives as if nothing had changed, and yet for me everything was changed.

The years that followed were filled with behavior I'd rather not discuss; I did everything I could do to erase the memory of that day.

But like a wound that is not treated, it becomes infected and the symptoms start to emerge. I lived many years with anxiety, depression, anger, nightmares and low self esteem, never understanding the link between these feelings and my past abortion.

It wasn't until years later that I met a woman who spoke to me of Hope. She understood what I was feeling because she also had been through the same thing. She led me through a Bible study and led me to Jesus. My healing had begun.

I have learned that because of the deep shame that abortion leaves on women, the majority of women don't speak about their abortion experience. And so they are left to suffer in silence. And the world is left unaware of the effects abortion leaves on men and women.

My hope is that you come to understand the lifelong impact abortion has on women. The decision to abort is something that women live with the rest of their lives.

Now, I can stand here today and blame my parents for what happened, the choice they made.

But that is not the truth.

The truth is that my parents believed the lie .... they never intentionally set out to hurt me. They just did not have the truth.

I have witnessed many times, when women and men are given the truth in a loving, non judgmental way .... they choose life. That is real choice!

So now I choose to be Silent No More, in the hope that more women will come forward to seek the healing that is waiting for them.

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