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Impossible to Stay Silent
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Pamela
Indiana,
United States
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My abortion experience changed my life in a profound way. I feel like it was a time of my life where I fell from grace and was held captive for 30 plus years. It wasn’t until I took part of an abortion scripture group that I was finally able to look at my sin head on.
I always felt the rape which resulted in my becoming pregnant was my fault because I was drinking and had passed out. There was so much pain and hurt in my heart that I bolted it up and tightened it securely. I wanted to make sure that it was not going to be penetrated. But the Lord had a plan in mind and began whispering healing into my heart about 10 years ago.
I wish I could say it happened over night, but it was a long process. He brought me back to Church and got me involved in Compassion Pregnancy. Although I thought I was there to help young women, little did I know God our Father was going to heal me. The healing program I was in reminded me of walking into the depths of Hell! I had to open all the wounds for Jesus to cleanse them. He worked and worked, and, since then, continues to cleanse.
I realize there were many decisions I made after the abortion which were self-destructive. I was very promiscuous and used alcohol and drugs, which just added on more shame. My whole being felt dead and I now wonder how I could have survived so long with such a zombie heart. Thank goodness for the Lord’s word which brought me back from the depths and restored, repaired, and renewed my heart.
It is just impossible for me to stay silent. I am ready to tell of His forgiveness and the tragedy of abortion.
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