My name is Deb, I am from St. Louis MO. I am a forgiven and redeemed child of God here to bear witness of His mercy and saving grace, which I desperately needed because of my decision in 1979, to end the life of my unborn-child.

Six months into a relationship I discovered I was pregnant. Because I feared the man’s disapproval and abandonment, and the shame of facing my family; I chose to abort my child.

The procedure was physically painful, but nothing could have prepared me for the spiritual, emotional and psychological consequences and pain I would suffer later. I was not relieved as others assured me that I would be. I was devastated. Reality set in, I allowed strangers to murder my innocent child. The guilt and shame were indescribable. I was inconsolable and could only weep at being left with the sense of loss in the deepest part of me. To deaden my pain I turned to alcohol and drugs living a half-conscious life.

In 1984 pregnant with my second child, I was terrified that God might exact His judgement for my past mistake. I was hopeful when my baby was born healthy followed by a third a few years later. The abortion memories faded, but the guilt and shame affected all of life until 2/5/1990, when I began a relationship with the man who would change my life, Jesus Christ. He offered reality. I saw the ugliness of my own heart and that I could not fix my past or any mistakes I’d made. I accepted Jesus’ gift of salvation, I experienced immediate forgiveness, healing however took time. Since working thru a Bible-Study-called Forgiven and Set Free.  I am captivated with Him. His love forgave me, saved me, and heals. That is why I am silent no more.