If there were just one decision in my life that I could "do-over", it would be the poor, uninformed, and scared choice to end the life of my first child through abortion. I was 18 years old, engaged to be married to my high school sweetheart. Trouble was, I would have been about seven months pregnant at our wedding, which would have been scandalous! I was a "good church girl", and I didn't want to tell our parents that we had been having sex. So, we both agreed to an abortion. My fiancé supported my decision, because that's what men were told to do then and are still told today.
The abortion clinic staff at Lovejoy Clinic in Portland assured me during all three of my visits that they’d take care of my “problem.” I know now my baby was NOT a "problem" to be solved and that I needed wise counsel, not more lies and denial! But there were no pregnancy resource centers who could have told me the consequences, risks and complications of abortion—information that is still denied to women today. Instead, the clinic staff told me, "It's not a baby yet, it's just a blob of tissue." And, "It's no big deal, your life can get back to normal."
Truth is, my abortion was NOT some magical "RESET" button. My life was never "NORMAL" again after walking through the doors of the abortion clinic.
The LOCKDOWN ON LIES must be unlocked, and the truth fully disclosed. Which is why in 2015 a colleague and I began what is now called S.M.A.R.T. Women's Healthcare - Science Matters in Abortion Related Trauma. Because real science does matter. In fact, the neurobiological and intertwined nature of pregnancy are some of the most profound miracles of science and nature.
I’m grateful for the many divine appointments in my life that have helped me heal after my abortion. But I wish I had had wise counsel, not people who lied to me and profited off ending the life of our child, a decision that has impacted every aspect of my life, marriage, mothering, and career. After all, ABORTION IS A PARENTING DECISION, and we need to be wisely teaching and empowering better "parenting" decisions than abortion.
May you walk away from this experience committed to Being The Change God Wants to See in the World.