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Healing the Shockwaves of Abortion


Do You Regret Your Abortion or Your Lost Fatherhood? By filling in the form below you can add your expression of regret to our list. All information remains confidential and is presented anonymously

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I Found Forgiveness
Nevada, United States

I was twenty years old and living with my boyfriend.  My parents had moved out of state so I was pretty much on my own, living with him when after about ten months together I found out I was pregnant.  Of course while we were dating and sexually active, he always said that if I became pregnant he would stand by me -I did not believe in abortion.   But the very day we found out, he went for a drive and came back saying that he didn't want the baby and that I needed to have an abortion.   The next few weeks he and his sister relentlessly insisted that I abort.  Meanwhile, I read baby and pregnancy books, but despite knowing it was wrong, I gave in and killed my baby.

During the abortion appointment, I cried filling out the paperwork, the women in the office did tell me I didn't have to go through with it but I would feel better after.  I fell asleep and woke up and it was over.  I cried all the way home.  I felt terribly disappointed in myself for not fighting for my baby, for not being stronger.

I lied to everyone about it.   After the abortion, we didn't talk about it, ever.  We broke up two years later.  I have since been married and divorced twice.   I have been blessed with three amazing children.  But have had zero trust in men, no real intimacy and when things get hard, I have run away.  I found forgiveness through Jesus Christ, knowing that He knows me through and through and loves me despite my failings.   That sums it up!

I am forty-one now, and engaged to a wonderful Catholic man.  We are saving ourselves for marriage, together almost three years now.  I have never been happier, but I might still need to name my baby and then help others. 


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