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Healing the Shockwaves of Abortion
 

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Do You Regret Your Abortion or Your Lost Fatherhood? By filling in the form below you can add your expression of regret to our list. All information remains confidential and is presented anonymously

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Walking in the Spirit of Forgiveness
Joyce
Maryland, United States

Hello, my name is Joyce. I come from an abusive family. My father was an abusive alcoholic. Raised in a family of eight, very poor. But I was raised in church, in a Baptist church. One thing the church never talked about was abortion or none of the other things that lead up to the abortion. At 18 when I graduated I was on my way into the military and I got pregnant. I had to make a decision whether I was going to serve Uncle Sam or I was going to take care of myself and this child. My boyfriend supported whatever decision I was going to make.

I made a decision to have an abortion and go into the Army. The impact of all of this is that I suffered a damaged kidney. I found out much later that half of my kidney was damaged because when I went into the military, I had this infection and the infection had gotten into the kidney, but it was the consequence of the abortion.

I did not do any follow-up from the abortion as I was told to do because I had to leave. This infection settled into my body, and into my kidney, and damaged half of my kidney. That was one of the impacts. The other impact was that the thought of this abortion where it felt like a vacuum cleaner just cleaning you out. I wanted to jump off the table and they literally held me down onto the table until this thing was over. That was something I would never, ever forget.

That impacted my life. I went into the military. I became very promiscuous, did a lot of drinking. I just could not get this thing out of my life, out of my thoughts. The pain, the consequences of it, was very painful.

Then in 1990 at a Christian conference, I saw the very first impact of an abortion when I saw aborted full babies, eight and nine months old. Aborted babies in a trash bag in the back of an abortion clinic. I just stood there and I cried. I cried because I had never seen the impact of the abortion, but now I saw what abortion did. I cried and that was the beginning of my healing for my pain.

As the years went on I got more involved in pro-life and pregnancy center counseling. I had my own counseling, and my own healing, and I can say today that I am healed by the grace of God. I am healed and set free. I've taken that course, Forgiven and Set Free, and you can be forgiven, and set free, and be able to serve the Lord Jesus Christ. Able to walk in the spirit of holiness and forgiveness, and be not ashamed when others point their fingers at you and point behind your back because people will do that.

As I go out and give my testimony, I've done the worst crime in the world, but I know that I've been forgiven and set free, and I praise God for that. I would like to say that as the shock waves of abortion does impact each and every one of our lives, that we know that there's a shock wave called Jesus Christ who can give us all the healing and forgiveness that we need. As we continue to go on, and stand for life, and do the things that God has called us to do. To speak out, and be bold about what we do, and what we say, and be about our Father's business. This pro-life march is such an example. The other thing that I like that's going on now that can impact my life is this movement called Black Lives Matter so I'm taking this to my community and I'm going on Facebook, and I'm saying yes, black lives do matter even in the mother's womb. That's why I will be silent no more.

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