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Healing the Shockwaves of Abortion


Do You Regret Your Abortion or Your Lost Fatherhood? By filling in the form below you can add your expression of regret to our list. All information remains confidential and is presented anonymously

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I saw my baby in pieces...

United States

I saw my baby in pieces

I looked in the phonebook. My boyfriend, his brother and his brother's girlfriend took me. I had it done 2 days after my 15th birthday. I did not need my mother's consent nor did I have to appear in front of a judge. I felt I had no other way out.

[The abortion was] Horrifying, very painful. I had my hands on my stomach and felt it going up and down. I cried the whole time silently. I then saw my baby in a tube and jar in pieces. I was 12 weeks pregnant. It lasted for 13 minutes. Before the abortion all they ever told me was that I would feel minor cramping and that I had to get it done soon because I was almost 12 weeks pregnant.

I broke up with my boyfriend. I became very bitter. I took drugs and drank a lot. I was extremely promiscuous. My ex boyfriend came down to the bus stop with an empty baby carriage and called me a baby killer and said I was going to go to hell. I also tried suicide.

For 6 1/2 years I blocked it out. I became a Christian 2 1/2 years ago and got married. I went to confession and Jesus is helping me to heal. I also named my baby Anthony and talk to him when I start hurting inside and it helps.

The day I killed my baby 9 years ago is something I think of every day. I will always regret it and long for my baby. I also have had physical problems. I had endometriosis and had surgery for that and now I don't ovulate, so I am on medication. I am afraid to face the fact that the only baby I may have ever conceived I killed.


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