I was 17 years old when I became pregnant.  I was afraid to tell my parents and waited until I was five months pregnant.  My mother, who at the time worked for New York University, arranged for me to have a saline abortion at Bellevue Hospital.    The day of the abortion I was dropped off at the hospital.  Saline was injected into my womb with a needle approximately six inches long.  I could feel the hot fluid that would burn and kill my baby enter my body.   I then waited about 24 hours before labor began.  I went through labor and delivery by myself with no medication and gave birth to my dead baby.  I later found out it was a baby boy.

My life spiraled into a life of self-hatred, drugs, alcohol, and wrong relationships.   I ended up having three more abortions.   Each time I felt like my life was being sucked out of me.   I felt dead inside, empty.  I tried to fill the emptiness with more drugs, alcohol, and relationships.  I hated myself and what I had become.  I wanted to die.

I lived a life of self-destruction for ten years until I gave my life to Jesus Christ.  He forgave my sins and delivered me.

  

It wasn’t until twenty-six years later that I heard about post abortion healing.  I went through the Bible study and found a deeper healing and restoration in my life that only God can give.  I finally feel free from the shame, and that´s why I am silent no more!